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October 10, 2011
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Comments: 30
Favourites: 15 [who?]

Views: 555 (0 today)
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Creative Commons License
Some rights reserved. This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
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:iconbalaria:
My submission to the Hope and Despair Under Empire contest: [link]

Hope you find it enjoyable. Comments are welcome.

*** 01/11/2011 ***

Did some pretty significant changes to the text. Changed the title. All around better I think.

*** 23/01/2012 ***

So the contest has ended. My piece came in a tied fourth place :) You can find the full winner list here: [link]

*** 02/09/2012 ***
Some minor edits for better readability.
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:iconragnaice:
~ragnaice Oct 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Wow. I wasn't sure about the squids in beginning but you really made it unfunny. It was actually pretty depressing but intense and captivating too, had me on the edge of my seat. :clap:
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:iconbalaria:
~Balaria Oct 12, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the comment.

Glad to hear you enjoyed the story :)
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:iconcristinewakesuphappy:
~cristinewakesuphappy Sep 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
congratulations on your DLD! :trophy:
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:iconbalaria:
~Balaria Sep 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you :)

You might also enjoy one of my other stories, which got a DD the next day. Similar sort of dark story: [link]
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:iconcristinewakesuphappy:
~cristinewakesuphappy Sep 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
that's definitely worth checking out. :bow: congratulations for the DD! :trophy:
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:iconcristinewakesuphappy:
~cristinewakesuphappy Sep 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
i'll definitely check it out. :bow:
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:icondailylitdeviations:
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by =DailyLitDeviations and has been selected as our "Pick of the Day". It is featured in a news article here: [link] and on our main page.

Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by :+fav:ing the News Article. Keep writing and keep creating.
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:iconbalaria:
~Balaria Sep 17, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Wow. Thank you so much for the feature :)
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:icondamonwakes:
*DamonWakes Sep 4, 2012   Writer
Despite the fantastical situation, this is all pretty believable. The mention of the old National Geographics was what really made it for me, though I also liked how human the squids were.

I noticed a few errors in this that I suspect might have been introduced while editing (where one word doesn't quite agree with the next, etc.). If you fancy going over this one more time, it might be worth it: but wait a while first so you don't just read what you remember writing. Easily worthy of a mention for the contest though, I think.
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:icon0hgravity:
*0hgravity Aug 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Interesting plot, the world felt fully-realized even though there was no extensive description of it (which is great). Great pace and the narrator was fun to follow.

The ending was desperately sad though.

I enjoyed reading nonetheless :)
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